Living in Crisis Mode

Ray A. Seilhamer
Bishop, 1993-2001

January 1999

In my role as a pastor to pastors, I regularly deal with the stresses and crises of being a clergyman in today's society. Pastors face the same life crises that other people do--a death in the family, a marital problem, a troublesome child, second thoughts about remaining in the pastorate. We have many superb families living in our parsonages, people who exemplify what it means to be a Christian parent, a Christian spouse, a Christian neighbor, a Christian worker. But crises can arise out of nowhere to bite the best of them.

Pastors, in turn, become involved in the various problems within the families of their congregation. As they should. But it seems that today's pastors operate in crisis mode perhaps more so than ever before. Much of this is due to the disintegration of families. Pastors often carry a heavy counseling load, and it can be messy.

Every profession has its minor crises. It's good for me to be around my brother-in-law, who farms. He doesn't faces the people issues I deal with. But equipment breaks, sometimes he can't get something apart, and often the right parts aren't in stock...and if they are, the cost is astronomical. So every profession has its stresses.

However, this is accentuated among pastors, who must deal with everybody's problems--problems much more complex than broken machinery. Marital crises and divorce. Sexual misconduct. Domestic violence. Youth homosexuality. Major illnesses. The suicide of a child. Alcohol and drug problems. Sometimes people look good when they sit in the pews on Sunday morning, but there are stresses and crises on the home front, and perhaps only the pastor--if anyone--is aware of it.

When I was pastor of the College Park church in 1969, we had only one divorced woman in the congregation--and most of the people didn't even know that she had been divorced early in her life. But by the end of those 13 years, we had many divorced people. Today, it would be difficult finding a church that doesn't have divorced people. Similarly, I dealt with homosexuality on a very limited basis. But today, pastors deal with it often. That is the reality of being a pastor in today's society.

You, as a layperson, need to be aware of three things:

1. Recognize that while everyone in your church deals with crisis issues, and every job carries its own unique stresses, nobody deals with crises in the quantity and depth that your pastor deals with them. Pastoral care means living with people through their crises

2. Operating in crisis mode can be exhausting--and that's when Satan likes to attack. When your pastor is immersed in people's personal crises--a beloved husband and father dying of cancer, a family on the verge of breakup, helping a couple deal with a teen who has attempted suicide--while still preparing sermons and teaching and preparing the bulletin and everything else--then is when you need to be most protective of your pastor. You know that when you are tired, you are more susceptible to temptation. The same is true of pastors.

3. Your pastor needs to be able to receive the training needed to better deal with the types of crises that arise. So many of the problems pastors face don't have easy answers. There may be legal and medical consequences which aren't readily apparent. Be generous in enabling your pastor to become better equipped to help the people of your congregation and community.